on purpose

where ATTENTION goes, ENERGY flows | travel musings

This is one the many source-unknown truths I've heard over the years, and like most truths, their meaning, depth, and symbolism not only shape & morph & change & grow & evolve & deepen with practice {meditation, yoga, capital Y yoga, journaling, mindfulness, etc} ...

But so do YOU. In relationship to said wisdom, in relationship to your body/mind/heart/spirit/soul, in relationship to others, in relationship to life.

where did this come from

I love remembering the very early days on my {now consciously, eternal} Yoga practice. Makes for delicious reflections, as well as enriches, solidifies and clarifies the evolution and growth of this thing we call life. Life lived, on purpose, with purpose, that is. Our embodiment of it all. 

I remember when I saw a pretty picture of this quote on Pinerest, or something like it.

In fact, literally, right this moment, I went to Pinterest to see if I could find it again. This one immediately, visually, triggered a memory:

I say visually, because I remember the soft pastel colours, the dreamy vibe of it. But, the funny thing is, that as you can see, I did not actually remember the words. At least not exactly. I remembered the essence of them, and how they got integrated into my experience, how they made sense in my brain, and likely how they could show up most powerfully as a practice ... for ME. 

In some cases, like a mantra or defined quote, yes, it is best to honour the original "quoted" words. But this one is definitely in the 'no one knows who said it' category. So, in my humble opinion it's kinda open source?! And, in full disclosure, if you practice with me, I can rarely get through a reading or poem without ad-libbing and/or kate-i-fying. It has to feel fully aligned for me, within me, in order to share. 

What matters, is how it feels in YOUR body. In YOUR experience. And how it can have the most powerful effect on the way you experience your body/mind/heart/soul/spirit, and life. 

I love looking back through the lens of pulling even more clarity and insight forward. And when we choose the 'right' anchor point to look back at, and look forward from, it gives a wonderful sense of progression, progress, possibility, growth, learning, and wisdom which can then be a catalyst for more going forward.

breaking it down

This is my working hypothesis around the growth process of embodying wisdom. It is also a work in progress.

First thought:

- oh, that's pretty (referring to the image, photograph or artwork the words laid upon)

Second thought:

- those words sound nice, that's pretty

- so "I'm" having a positive reaction to what I'm receiving. Cool.

- which then morphs into, okay, ya, that makes sense. Logical mind is trying to figure out its validity, it's 'what's in it for me (wiifm)', its value, its merit in MY life, whether it is worth committing to memory (or god help me, try) & if I think it's justified etc etc

- this evolves into awareness around how these words make me feel. Conscious awareness. Beyond the 'my eyes like how pretty it is & my ears like how pretty that sounds', now my heart, emotional body and sensory body, maybe even energetic & spiritual body is coming online, and feeling the vibratory resonance of this truth. Even writing those words now, I can appreciate where my mind & awareness was those many years ago, & how I would immediately discount this as woohoo; I just couldn't grasp, relate, logically understand & had never felt it or experienced it = discomfort = mind dismisses it.

- But when it's explored w curiosity, experienced thru applied & embodied practice & life lived, integration begins. This could be through many forms of mindfulness & inquiry & contemplation: in meditation, in yoga (say, as an intention, theme for your practice), in writing/journaling, thru daily life off-the-cushion as an informal mindfulness type practice.

I explored this is my yoga class yesterday. Then throughout the day. Then again in my meditation practice this morning. A lot of musings and awareness emerged.

Such as::

{the TYPE of attention = the TYPE of energy}

... to be continued.

Ughhh gotta get off the screen. Spoons be drained. 

Can't wait to continue this one. Stay tuned! Share your feels, your thoughts! 

xo k

desire map + yoga ... the prequil

Let’s be brutally honest, I never EVER thought I would be trading in suits, offices, and 4-inch pumps, for lulu pants, a yoga mat, and flip-flops. Never.

But let’s be clear, The Desire Map isn’t about quitting your day job, blowing up your world, or glorifying entrepreneurial life. It’s about figuring out YOU and how you truly, actually, want to feel. In every area of your life. Then making it happen.

Then making it happen (and this is big), means learning how to generate those feelings through the choices you make on the daily; doing what it takes, to feel that way. On your terms. From the seemingly mundane everyday tasks, to those big luscious, dreamy goals.

THE DRIVING FORCE - a feeling?

Once you’ve gone in, “done the work” {aka LEVEL 1} and know what your Core Desired Feelings are, the shift begins. You start seeing, creating, and aligning meaning + purpose around things you may never have noticed before, completely shifting your relationship with things, people, pursuits, and experiences.

Behind every thought, every word, every action, every goal is a desire to FEEL a certain way. It’s as simple and as complicated as that. And it’s completely unique to you.

WHO IS OLD KATE?

To help you understand why this material is so powerful, I’d like to give you a little peek into “old kate”, through this gift, this lens, we call hindsight. 

I was best described as a workaholic, perfectionist, type A, over achiever. Whatever it was, it was never enough.
Passionate, absolutely. High performance, you bet.
Content, not even close.

Only now can I see that I was on achievement auto-pilot. All pressure and proving. No awareness of what was driving the behaviour. And like any addict, over time it took more and more to get the same “high”, and the highs were less and less fulfilling. Not to mention I barely stopped long enough to acknowledge one.

All my value, my self-worth was tied up in things “out there”, outside of me. I had lost the connection TO ME, the whole me, “in here”.

So, on January 20th, 2011 when I fell down a flight of stairs and suffered a serious Traumatic Brain Injury, I was pretty certain I had lost it all. That it was over. That I was over. Everything I valued was gone. What was left?

For a time, surviving didn’t feel like much of a gift. I was convinced that my life as I knew it was over {side bar: which in a way it was, and thank god! That said, it took me many years to get here, to feel this way}.  

Here’s how I saw it at the time - if I couldn’t do that big job, climb the ranks, build a family, work crazy hours, make the big bucks, volunteer on boards AND do piles of extra curricular activities … I was a waste. I was a failure. I was broken. And what was the point.  

When in fact, I had lost the whole point.

WAKING UP - LIFE LIVED. ON PURPOSE. WITH PURPOSE.

“You have seen my decent. Now watch me rise.” - Rumi

I had to shatter into a million pieces in order to wake-up. That was MY process. I didn’t hear the whisper, the call, or even the scream. I had to literally be smacked up side the head to wake up. 

To make a very long story short, after years of rehab and every therapy you can think of, a lot of which continues to this day, I have been reborn. As me.

Like the caterpillar, I went into a cocoon, turned into goo, and through the miraculous human metamorphosis process. I underwent a massive transformation. Slowly, but surely, growing into my butterfly life.

The process of waking up. The process of designing and building and creating a LIFE LIVED. ON PURPOSE. WITH PURPOSE. Doesn’t actually have a lot to do with becoming someone new. But has everything to do with becoming YOU. It’s more of a remembering, an opening, an allowing, a coming home.

The caterpillar was always destined to become a butterfly. Just as we are destined to grow into who we really are.
It’s just not outlined in a textbook, and the cocoon process for humans doesn’t look quite the same from person to person.

THE DESIRE MAP + YOGA

This magical toolkit began unfolding, in seemingly mysterious ways, over many years. I couldn’t have predicted, prepared for, or even dreamed up how this all unraveled. Life is not a straight line, but man, am I up for the ride.

Between Yoga {capital Y yoga, which includes Meditation and so much more}, h’Art, and The Desire Map I found the clarity I was looking for. The tools I was looking for. I found peace in the process. The Desire Map helped me to unravel the layers, and ultimately to figure out how I most want to feel, to feel the way I most want to feel - in a way that is wholly liberating, nourishing, empowering, and loving.

No more pressure. No more proving. And a whole lot more living.

Today, I am determined to share what I’ve learned, to help others::

1. Prevent the fall / hitting rock bottom (literally or metaphorically), or

2. Navigate their own metamorphosis process, their own rising, their own transformation, at whatever stage they are at, and

3. Feel good in the process! To take your life back.

Together, we will embrace the clarity, truth, and liberation that comes when you tap into the driving force behind all your choices: How you want to feel.

JOIN ME - START THE JOURNEY OF A LIFETIME

Two of the big game changers for me, which are fundamental to The Desire Map process are:: 

  • Feeling good is the whole point. Can you give yourself permission to make feeling good your primary intention?
  • The journey should feel as good as (we hope) the destination will feel. Can you create a soul-nourishing, life-affirming (not soul-depleting) relationship with the pursuit of what you want?

Does this resonate? Does this stir up your mind, heart, body and/or soul at some level, at any level?

If your answer is yes, then I invite you to join me on this journey. The journey of a lifetime. Which, trust me, is elevated to the highest of heights when we go through it together. There is massive power in the collective experience.

Essentially The Desire Map brings living to life.
It unlocks your aliveness.
And is entirely liberating.

I wholeheartedly believe in living. Living life as a verb.
Life lived. On purpose. With Purpose.

At the heart of this, the whole point really, is feeling good.

Fully embodied. Aligning mind & body. Heart & Soul. Whole. Integrated. Resonating. Together.

On breath. One moment. One choice at a time.

This is Yoga after all. A match made in heaven.
What a magical brew.
The choice is up to you. I would be honoured to be your guide!

Check out katedurie.com/workshops for upcoming dates for LEVEL 1 or LEVEL 2. I also run an INTRO workshop to help light the spark to begin your journey.

xo